Strawberry Pie
by Shimy
Summary: Kida has been too curious about surface-world cuisine, and is now entitled, like the rest of the Ulysses crew, to undergo one of Cookie's meals. But none of them had expected a dessert. One-shot.


**Author's note: just as a piece of information, this could be a missing scene in "An Endless Mystery" (between chapter 4 and chapter 5). It's really silly and is only meant to be funny, so don't expect anything too smart. But I do hope you will enjoy it nonetheless!! =D**

* * *

Milo looked at Kida, who sat next to him. She seemed to be enjoying herself as much as he did. Which meant absolutely not. Although they had all agreed they should celebrate one last time before the remaining members of the Ulysses crew left Atlantis to return to the surface, it was obvious they had not expected _this_ to happen. '_This_' was the fact Cookie had decided to cook a whole meal for them all. How it had happened, though, was fairly simple to explain: Kida had expressed her curiosity about surface-world gastronomy. Unfortunately Milo and the others had all been too late to dissuade her from tasting what could be described as Cookie's own personal definition of the very word 'gastronomy'. As if feeling Milo's gaze, Kida lifted her eyes from her now empty plate –how she had managed to swallow it completely without feeling the need to throw it up, she would never know- and looked into his chestnut brown ones. A small smile played on her lips as he frowned his eyebrows to signify her that this was officially all her fault. Reaching out for his hand under the long occasional table, she intertwined her fingers with his and squeezed them gently to let him know how truly sorry she was. He seemed to relax under her touch, and gave a small shrug before returning his attention to his own plate with a slight look of disgust. Kida looked around her: except for the little man called Mole and Cookie himself –who was the only one who had wolfed down everything he had put on his own plate-, all the other members of the crew had a similar expression on their faces. And silence had fallen upon them all since the 'meal' had begun.

"This meal's boring. I'm going to get some air and take a closer look at those flying vehicles", Audrey suddenly stated, ready to stand up and leave straight away.

"Boring?" Cookie repeated, sounding absolutely astonished.

"Yes, boring. No one's said a single word! You're boring!"

"We're fed up." Vinny unconvincingly stated.

"And so you're boring. You're either screaming your heads off or completely mute."

"Didn't you say you wanted to get some air?" Mrs. Packard sarcastically remarked.

"It'll wait. There's dessert." Cookie announced.

"There you've got it!" Doctor Sweet joyously claimed.

"Have what?" Milo asked.

"A nice dessert might improve the ambience!"

"Nice? Dessert? Cookie? You see nothing wrong?"

* * *

A cold shiver ran through Milo's spine, and even Kida felt it ripple through their still intertwined fingers. What the 'dessert' Cookie had put at the centre of the table was, she had no idea, but it certainly did not look appetizing at all. At least she wasn't the only one who kept both blinking and staring at it blankly!

"Do we just stare at it?" Kida shyly asked.

"'It' is a strawberry pie. And I made it!" Cookie quite violently remarked.

"Madre de Dios! You know what strawberries are?" Audrey pointed out.

"Do we eat it or just look at it?" Kida tried again.

"We'll eat it, don't worry." was the answer she got from a very proud Cookie.

"If you made it, I'm worried." Sweet remarked.

"Me too." Vinny agreed.

"And me." Milo added.

"Not me!"

Everyone turned their heads to shoot a deadly glare at Mole.

"Before we begin eating it, I'd like you to know it was made for Helga. Because she liked strawberries." Cookie announced, sounding curiously solemn.

"So do I." Milo remarked, but Cookie ignored him.

"Well now she's gone and we're left with the pie. It's sad. That's why I'm not digging in. I'm sad about her and so is Wilhelmina."

The explorers and Kida looked at each other for a second, and then at Mrs. Packard who was still speaking through her headphone and who had not paid the slightest attention to what had just been said.

"_No, Marge, he's about to poison us with a pie._"

Another silence followed, this time rather amused. Cookie made a grumbling sound.

"I don't believe it! Well, Milo and I are sad!"

"It is true that you look sad, Milo-toap." Kida gently pointed out whilst caressing the back of his hand with her thumb.

"What? No, I'm fine!" A bewildered Milo replied, completely taken aback.

"Don't be stupid, boy!! You're glum and teary-eyed. You're sad!" Cookie violently objected.

"I'm glum because I don't understand why we're all staring at a pie and I'm teary-eyed through fighting to stay awake, that's all!"

"You wind me up!! Can't you spare a thought for absent loved-ones and forget feeding your faces?"

"A thought's one thing, but not eating..."

"Okay! Okay! Okay! Knock it off! If you won't be serious, pass your plates!"

"I really shouldn't…"

* * *

If silence had fallen so heavily again, it was not so much because of the lack of conversation. It was rather because no one could utter a word, even if they had wanted to. And it was enough for Cookie to erupt again.

"What's the problem now? Does it taste bad?"

To everyone's surprise, it was Vinny who gave the most appropriate answer.

"It's worse than that, actually. Back on Mr. Whitmore's ship, before the submarine was launched, I saw some strawberries. I ate a whole load. Because, you know, left alone, strawberries are, eh, edible. These are probably the same strawberries, but some miraculous process I cannot even begin to imagine has made them...you know, like rocks."

"It's how they're cooked, you idiot!"

"You know, it's funny; I usually leave the pastry and eat the fruit." Audrey remarked.

"And now?" Kida wanted to know.

"Pues, I'm leaving it all."

"Won't you shut up?! I'm not asking you to eat bricks!"

"Without wanting to sound too sarcastic, Cookie, the only concrete difference between this thing and bricks is that you call it a pie!" Sweet shot back.

Of course, everyone safe Cookie erupted into laughter, but that laughter soon ended as a shrill cry of pain came from the other end of the table.

"What's wrong, Mole?" the doctor inquired immediately.

"I think I cut my gum on a cooked lump!!... Is that possible?"

"Stop whining, you French numbskull!! It's not as if you were about to die!"

"Can't say the same for us." Milo whispered into Kida's ear. She giggled and smiled warmly at him.

"Anyway, Cookie, if you make a pie for each departure, I've had it! I don't care, next time, I quit!" Audrey declared, the last remnants of her patience gone.

But she had not expected the looks of utter horror on all of her companions' faces as they cried with one voice.

"**No, don't! He'll start cooking!"**


End file.
